SHANNON LINK'S COUSIN

This story is mainly for humour and not plot, and it was fairly dissapointing to me. But I put it up here anyways :)
If you have feedback, send it to
Shan83181@aol.com.

Link was busy hanging out in his blissful world called Kokiri forest, playing tennis with his sword and using the deku-nut spitting bush guy as a tennis ball machine.

"Darn, I missed that one!" snapped Link as he swung forcefully at a deku nut and missed.

"You gotta keep your eye on it or otherwise you'll won't do so good at the Hyrule Cup Tennis Finals," said the bush guy.

"Oh well, I've probably practicing a little too long anyways. Well, I'll meet you later tomorrow for practice, ok?"

"Sure thing."

Link grudgingly climbed up the ladder to his house and dragged along his huge master sword with him, the one he used to swat away the deku nuts during tennis practice. He crashed on his bed and pulled out a book and started reading. Then came a knock at his door.

"Who is it?" cried Link from his room.

"It's me, the Kokiri mailman."

"Oh. Ok. Well, let's see what we have in the mail today."

Link opened the door to the mailman and browsed through his mail..

"Ok, let me see. Junk mail, bills, junk mail, magazine renewal form, oh! Here's something I didn't expect."

"What is it?" asked the mailman.

"It's a letter," replied Link, opening it. "It says my cousin Jeebo is coming to visit me for a week."

"I never knew you had a cousin."

"Oh yeah. Years ago, we used to play together every afternoon after the Kokiris left school for the day. It was cool. We hung out at the local Kokiri Malt Shop, played tag, took fencing lessons. Man, those were the days. Then, several years later, he moved away to the Desert Colossus to go to the University of Hyrule and he barely ever gets time to come back here and visit. Heck, the last time he sent me a letter was four years ago on Christmas."

"Gee, that's a long time. Well, Link, I'd love to stay and chat but I've got mail to deliver. Saria's waiting for a very important package."

Link went back inside and started to write a letter to Cousin Jeebo to tell him he received his letter but before he could even lift the pencil, there was a loud knock at the door.

"Who is it?"

"Heeeeeey Link! It's me, your ol' Cousin Jeebo! Did ya get my letter?"

"Yeah. I just got it today."

"Cool. Aren't you excited that I'm stayin' at your place for a week?"

"Well yes, but..."

"Cool!"

Jeebo barged in Link's house. He was tall, thin, had freckles, and his hair was the color of carrots. He wore a brown tunic, white leggings, plain brown boots, and an oversized fur coat. His hat was covered with stickers bearing the name "University of Hyrule." Link took one long look at Jeebo. He had certainly changed since the last time I saw him, Link thought to himself. Heck, the last time I saw him, he was shorter than the bush fella I was playing tennis with earlier.

So Link sat down on his bed and said, "Jeebo, pull up a chair and tell me what you have been doing all these years."

"Well, I got accepted into the University of Hyrule and I was the starting quarterback for the Hyrule Lions football team."

"Hey that's great," said Link cheerfully. "And then what?"

"I got kicked off the team."

"Why? What happened?"

"Because I kept forgetting which goalpost was ours."

"Did you do anything else?"

"I was a teacher's assistant for chemistry but I accidentally mixed that red potion you use with some chlorinated Hylian water and it blew up the laboratory. Luckily, no one was seriously injured."

"Did you have any success at all in college."

"Oh yeah. I got straight A's in one class."

"What class was that, Jeebo?"

"Uh, lemme see....oh, yeah. It was my beginning art class in my sophomore year."

This is going to be one long week, Link thought to himself.

The first day with Jeebo was harmless until Link awoke to find an awful singing voice. It turned out that Jeebo woke up early and was singing rather loudly in the shower.

"Jeebo, could you please stop singing?" asked Link politely. "Some of my neighbors are complaining to me that they can't sleep with all this noise. Besides, it's 6:00 a.m.!"

"Aw, Cousin Link! How am I supposed to keep myself energetic in the morning if I don't sing in the shower?"

"Can't you sing in a more, moderate tone of voice?"

"Sure, whatever you say, Cousin."

When Link was dressed and freshened up, he found Jeebo browsing the refrigerator, wearing a stained, white tunic, leggings with holes in the knees, and old boots.

"I'm just lookin' fer breakfast, Cousin Link," he said smiling. "Then, I'm going out into Kokiri Forest to see everyone I haven't seen in years."

"Not looking like that you aren't," said Link in a firm voice. "I'll lend you one of my clean tunics and leggings and you can wear my iron boots. Just don't scratch them. And another thing, if you're going to stay here for a week, don't raid my refrigerator."

"Sorry Cousin Link."

After breakfast, the duo took a walk down memory lane and went up to the Deku Tree.

"Wow, the Deku Tree hasn't changed one bit," said Jeebo, walking towards it.

"I remember we used to play here as boys, Link."

"Yeah, and when we played tag, you always tripped over the roots that stuck out of the ground," said Link with a smile. "And the Deku Tree always had to use the magic it had to treat your skinned knees."

When they got back to Link's house for dinner, Jeebo glanced at a picture on a shelf.

"Who is this?" asked Jeebo, pointing to the picture.

"Oh, that's Princess Zelda. She's a friend of mine," said Link, gazing at the picture.

"Oooohhhhhh, Link's got a girlfriend, Link's got a...."

"Shhhh!" Link clamped his hand over Jeebo's mouth. "Not so loud. You want the whole Kokiri tribe to hear? Besides, she's not my girlfriend. She just happens to be a good friend of mine."

"Sorry Cousin Link."

The next few days were the worst. Link kept waking up in the middle of the night to hear Jeebo watching TV with the volume turned all the way up. Link would often wake up at 6 in the morning to listen to Jeebo's glorious voice in the shower. Jeebo would also beat him to the breakfast table and leave nothing for Link except a few bread crumbs and a glass of the red potion.

A few days later, Jeebo went out for a short walk. Link sat on his balcony with Navi at his side.

"Hey Link," said Navi. "You look a little down in the mouth. What seems to be the trouble?"

"It's my cousin."

"Cousin Jeebo?"

"Yeah. He keeps waking me up early, eating me out of house and home, using up all the hot water so he could shower, and on top of that, he sings in the shower so loud that it broke one of Saria's windows. And I had to pay 150 rupees to replace it. I can't stand to live with that guy another minute because he's worn out his welcome. He said he'd stay for a week and now it's been two weeks and I've had at least 3 hours sleep every night."

"Gee, you've had a lot of trouble lately," said Navi. "Why didn't you just ask him politely to leave earlier?"

"Well, I tried to do that but every time I open my mouth to do so, he keeps saying that I'm his favorite cousin and that he really appreciates me letting him stay."

"Wow."

"Yeah. Well, I'll try to talk to him tonight, Navi. I hope I can get everything straightened out."

"Well, good luck. I'll be seeing you. The Deku Tree wants me to fly over to Hyrule Castle real quick. I'll see you tomorrow, Link."

Link waved until Navi was out of sight. He walked back into his room and crashed on his bed. Then, Jeebo came in.

"Heeeeey Cousin Link. I just had a wonderful walk. It was so refreshing!"

"Uh Jeebo, I need to talk to you."

"Ok Cousin." He sat next to Link on the bed.

"Jeebo, you've been wonderful company and I've enjoyed having you over but it's been frustrating the last few days. You've used the TV and my refrigerator without my permission. You've sang louder in the shower than any opera tenor on earth and probably enough to wake the dead in the Castle
Graveyard in Kakariko Village. I just can't take it anymore. Tomorrow, I want you to pack up all your things and go back home to your dorm at the university."

"Why Cousin Link! I'm sorry. I didn't mean to do all that stuff. I just forgot."

"You can't just forget things, Jeebo. There are things that are very important that you need to remember and keep in your head. Besides, you said you'd stay here for a week, and now you've stayed for 2 weeks."

"Oh, I forgot about that too. I'm sorry Cousin Link. If you hate me, I understand."

"Jeebo, I never said I hated you. In fact, I don't hate you. You're the coolest friend a Kokiri could ever have. It's just that you've worn out your welcome here."

"I see. So you want me to go home first thing tomorrow morning, huh?"

"Yep."

"Ok." Jeebo walked slowly to his belongings and started to pack.

"Listen Jeebo," said Link. "I'm sorry I raised my voice at you. It's not that I don't like you, it's just that you need to go back to your own home or your dormitory or whatever. Just to let you know, you can come back and visit me anytime you like as long as you let me know when you're coming over and how long you're staying."

Jeebo's frown formed into a smile. "Ok Cousin Link!"

The next morning, Link and Jeebo said their goodbyes and exchanged addresses since Jeebo had changed dormitories at the university.

"Jeebo, I'll miss you, man!"

"I'll miss you too, Link." He thumped Link on the back and almost knocked him over. "Hey, remember you can always drop by my dorm anytime you want, Link ol' buddy."

"Thanks. You are welcome here anytime, Jeebo, as long as I know when you're coming." The two cousins high-fived each other and Link stood by his house as Jeebo slung his bags and other belongings over his shoulder and walked off.

Link walked into his room and lay face up on his bed. Jeebo had been gone for only five minutes and all the horror was over, but yet, Link still felt a pang of loneliness in his heart and didn't even notice Navi flying overhead.

"Hey Link," said Navi. "Where's Jeebo?"

"He left."

"You finally talked to him?"

"Yeah, but we'll keep in touch and he'll be back to visit sooner or later."

"Hey Link, is that a tear in your eye."

"No," said Link, sounding like he was going to burst into sobs. "I just have allergies, that's all. Only the little Kokiri cry."

Navi chuckled to herself as she left Link's house. "I don't know if it's just me or if Link actually misses Jeebo messing up his life," she said to herself.


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